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Wednesday, October 12, 2005

vabbe' sto mese ho toccato il limite....

ho capito che mi becco ragno porcellino, cane vanesio e puzzola barbona che mi viene a distruggere i sacchetti dell'immondizia e tiene alla larga persino i procioni...
pensavo che il caso del colibri' che veniva a tirare craniate sul vetro della finestra (che ho dovuto dipingere per un certo periodo per salvargli la pelle) fosse stato l'apice.

Dico io, si che vivo in collina e c'ho una pineta accanto, ma non sto mica nella jungla!

lo scoiattolo che mi entra in casa e svaligica la scatola dei crackers e' stato il massimo. Dite voi... ma tu come lo sai che era uno scoiattolo? perche' sono entrata in stanza e l'ho trovato ancora la' che dormivaaaa, il porcooo XDDD!

una scena da comiche, entro in camera seguita da woofie e trovo briciole dappertutto (una scia) come se mi fosse esplosa una bomba a mano nel cartone dei crackers.... prima guardo woofie storto poi lo vedo accanirsi contro la mia copertina di Hello Kitty, lo guardo storto di nuovo e sto per fiondarlo per le scale quando noto un supernido di crackers ed un batuffolo marrone che dorme a pancia all'aria e forse russa pure... e si gratta il pancino...
woofie coraggiosamente e' corso nel mio armadio e si e' infilato nella mia borsa della classe di ceramica, continuando ad abbaiare da li' O_O (e' un prode sto cane). Lo scoiattolo si sveglia di soprassalto, manca l'uscio della portafinestra e tira una craniata allucinante contro il vetro.
Barcolla e cade. oddio si e' ammazzato, penso, lo avvolgo nella copertina e lo metto sul balcone con un po' d'acqua e il resto dei crackers (tanto li aveva quasi finiti)... intanto faccio quello che devo fare per ripulire la stanza ma ogni tanto lancio uno sguardo... dopo un po' lo vedo che si sveglia e scuote la testa della serie "madonna che craniataaaa!", poi beve, si ficca 5 crackers nelle guance e scappa via. Due samsonite c'aveva al posto delle guance.

Era stato attirato nella mia stanza dal barattolo dei vermi, visto che ai miei vermi do' sempre da mangiare noccioline coperte di zucchero... infatti ho trovato il barattolo a terra ed il coperchio ammaccato (ma che era una lontra sto scoiattolo?). Se i vermi avessero occhi li avrei trovati cosi' @_@ chissa' che trauma poverini.

La coperta di Hello Kitty e' stata disinfettata!

Sono circondata aiutatemi!

Monday, October 03, 2005

the day jack sparrow came to my house: dreams do come true!!!

Hi Neha,
I woke up this morning nice and relaxed and my friend K-chan calls me
and says:
"I'll be there for lunch"
Good, I thought, you'll be having lentils cuz I didn't go grocery
shopping. I still felt guilty and washed my nice zibibbo grapes and
looked up a couple of recepies online then decided : would it be bad
if I were wearing pj's?
I felt guilty so I put on some nice comfy house clothes.
She told me she would stop for a couple of hours only though, you know
just to eat, say hi/bye wash the dishes and go. Well actually she was
nice enough to tell me she wanted to cook with me and then she called
at 1pm saying she was running a little late for she was stuck in traffic.
Very little I knew that day I'd be kidnapped by a pirate, for real.
When the doorbell rang, my roommate went to open the door for me and
then yelled "it's for you"
first thought was "why was he at home on a sunday?" the second thought
when I looked through the door was "Oh My God! Jack Sparrow!"
All shaky and with his perfect drunken accent he said "I heard it was
someone's birthday here not too long ago!!!" I turned purple. Me, he's
here for me... Dreams do come true! Oh, crap I ran out of peanut butter! (that's my wildest dream... always has to do with jack sparrow and peanut butter)
He came in, nevertheless, with his big boots followed by 3 of my
friends, who received no greeting from me cuz I was idiotically
staring at Jack Sparrow! I mean Jack sparrow is coming in my house,
would I even care to ask him to take his shoes off? of course not,
"everybody come in with shoes, please, my roommate waxed the floor
yesterday especially for the occasion." (so that's why he waxed!<__<)
So I just walk all around my favourite pirate, I check his tattoes,
and the beads in the hair and even the mascara under the eye... tell
you more: his jaw is even scortched! Very little I know, after I check him out real good, he opens his
treasure chest and start taking out ropes, cards, magic markers,
scissors (that he called Skisors) and stuff. This Jack Sparrow here, was quick with fingers...
after the first few magic tricks he did with a little kerchief, he
passed to riggings (ropes on dry land as he mentioned) and cards! O_O
I was aghast, he had no sleeves so where was the trick?
The dog was hypnotized thinking "this guys has more hair than I do"
and barked at him a while and Jack looked at him and said "funny looking
rat you got there!"
In the end he left a doblone an invitation to a pirate festival,
a card with his website on it www.pirate4hire.com and me, still being
all purple turned to my friend and said "if this is a dream, don't
wake me up!"
And by golly I didn't!



Now I have to start focusing on gacchan!!! maybe by next year I'll get him too.